“Petty Officer Lopez, it is with great sadness that we regret to inform you that due to the recent medical conditions observed and documented, we are going to have to separate you from continued military service”. As I read these words aloud, I felt the sharp pain of each word pierce my heart. It definitely stung more than I expected it to. For 12 years, I dedicated my life, my time and my best efforts for my country, my brothers and sisters in arms, and the United States Navy. For 12 years, I answered the call, stood the watch, and stayed focused on the security and safety of the American people. I joined the military at 17, and left for boot camp shortly after graduating high school. The military transformed me from being a childish, wild teenager into a poised, professional individual that embodied honor, courage, and commitment not only to myself but to everyone that I came into contact with.With the tools I was given when I first entered into the military, I dedicated endless hours in pursuit of becoming the person that I strived so hard to become, not only a leader, but someone of strong moral fiber that my son could look up to and respect. I was transformed into the best person that I knew I would eventually become one day.Going from just mopping floors and taking out trash, to leading and training hundreds of junior sailors was certainly an honor and a privilege. I felt like I had finally obtained my purpose, a hard-working woman that would do great things for the United States Navy.Even with having surgery for a long overdue injury, I was back on my feet and back to work within a matter of weeks. I was firm on getting back to where I was needed.I was not only a wife and mother, I was a full-time student going to college online leading to graduating with high honors, on top of my full-time job as an Administrative Supervisor, and furthermore, I was also one of top Air Intercept Controllers in the entire US Naval Fleet. My mentor was one of the first TOP GUN graduates and he showed me with many examples of tough love that persistence and dedication would bring out my most valuable and strongest assets that I had to offer others. I was on my way to TOP GUN school within the year and I was overly joyed with the new career potential that awaited me.But with great rewards, came great sacrifice. In the twelve years that I loyally served in the military, I deployed over 7 times, with lengths of 6-9 months at a time eventually put tough strain on my marriage, myself, and over the last few years, my time away from my only child.
I started noticing my once energetic, upbeat self, start to evaporate in the wind. I began to experience extreme fatigue, agonizingmigraines, and severe chronic pain at all times of the day. Even when I would be conducting my routine air control exercises, my hands would began to shake and waves of panic and doubt would flood my mind. What was happening to me? I would question over and over again. I went from running 3 miles at 5am every single morning to barely being able to get out of bed. My superiors started to get concerned how I went from being an individual that was exceptional with multi-tasking projects to barely being able to remember one assignment at a time. I found myself struggling just to be able to keep up with the demand. I kept telling myself it was just exhaustion and that I needed to slow down and take a much overdue break. I had to man up and come to terms where I stood at that moment in my life and went to my supervisors and notified them of what I was going through. Thankfully, since I had worked so hard to train my subordinates, they were able to carry on in my absence and I was able to be reassigned to administrative tasks so I could attend medical appointments and get my health and well-being back under control. After what seemed like a lifetime of labs, x-rays, physical therapy, and medications, I was finally able to get answers of what was happening, I had severe fibromyalgia, anxiety disorder, and chronic migraines. The news felt like a wave had just smacked me in the face. Everything that I had worked so hard for, was now going to go away. As an air controller, medical issues are only allotted for ONLY a few items. Anything requiring medication or therapy is an automatic disqualification in the controlling field. Upon receiving the news, I was transferred to medical hold to attempt to get the treatment I needed so that I would be able to return in the near future. As the months progressed on medical hold, my doctors noticed my conditions continued to decline and I was referred to a medical evaluation board where I awaited my fate.
In November 2015, I left the US Navy after 12 years with much sadness but I was proud of everything I had achieved. I had gone farther than I ever expected and was able to leave with my head held high. Since then, each day is a struggle but I continue to focus on the blessings in my life to keep myself going. I have a great counselor that is great to talk to, a wonderful husband son who are my inspiration to keep going and are the best support system a woman could ask for and I continue to do volunteer work in my local community especially for other disabled veterans who have had it much worse than I. I hope with me continuing my education, I can prove once again to be a valuable asset to my community and not restricted by disabilities I now face.
